1) Take her on a real date.
First dates should not consist of getting drunk at a bar with all your or her friends. Go somewhere quiet where you can actually spend time getting to know one another. You need to figure out whether this whole lesbian dating thing is something that you really want to pursue before introducing her to everyone you know.
2) Make conversation.
If you and your date don't know each other very well yet, have some conversation starters ready. School, work, travel, music, or other topics with universal appeal are the best. Stay away from controversial topics. You may not want to spend the rest of your life with someone whose political or religious beliefs are different from yours but for a first date, what you don't know won't hurt you.
Don’t just talk about yourself, as fascinating as that topic may be. Encourage her to talk about herself. She will be more interested in you if she feels that you are interested in her. If the relationship has a future, there will be plenty of time for you to share your side, but if there’s no future, there’s no reason she has to know intimate details about your life.
3) Be yourself.
You should present the best version of yourself, naturally, but you should never exaggerate or make things up. In the first place, if the relationship lasts, you will eventually be found out, and that will be awkward at the very least. Further, you want to make sure that she likes you for who you really are, and the best way to do that is to be the real you from the very start.
4) Pay (or at least offer).
Typically in same-sex relationships, the person who invited should pay. It’s important to choose something that fits into your budget and doesn’t make your date uncomfortable. Some women don't like the idea of having someone else pay their way at all, so if she expresses a desire to pay her own half, you shouldn’t push the issue. Simply say that you are more than happy to pay her way, but if she insists, drop it and let her pay her half. Don't let money become an issue at the beginning of your relationship.
5) Decide how to end the date.
If you’ve been paying attention to all the little signals during your date, it should be apparent what direction the date has taken. If a second date seems promising, feel free to ask, but if you’re not sure, it might be nice to have some time to think it over. The two of you may even decide to end the night with a kiss - or possibly even more. There is no right or wrong way to end a date, as long as both have their feelings accounted for.
If the date went really badly, it’s best to not even try a second date. A failed first date will seldom result in a better second date. Sometimes, there’s just no spark, and that’s not something you can easily fix. If you find yourself in this situation, just chalk it up to experience and try again.
My book Lesbian Sex Secrets: How to Have Amazing Sex With Another Woman aims to help bi-curious, bisexual, and lesbian women take their sex lives to another level. To give your lover the best sex she’s ever had, starting tonight, click here!